Insecure. /insəˈkyo͝or/ adj.
- (of a person) not confident or assured; uncertain and anxious.
n.
- a critically acclaimed show on HBO.
Where do I begin with my obsession with Issa Rae. It’s at a point that if I were to ever meet her, I would probably scream “TWINSIES”, prompting me to be swiftly escorted out by security. But that would never stop me from talking about Insecure or Issa Rae or how I relate to all of her idiosyncrasies. Truth be told, Issa and the works she’s created have made be realize that I am a normal black girl; and more so that no matter how much society shoves these stereotypes down our throats, we cannot be a stereotype and still be normal.
But my flamboyant persona isn’t what I’m here to discuss. We’re here to talk about the truth of life that Insecure has brought to television, for multiple demographics, in a way other millennial-focused programs have failed to do. Some may say that there are hundreds of programs that already do this, but to burst your bubble without hurting your feelings, there aren’t many. Mediocrity has proven to yield season after season of bland on multiple networks, but here comes a show that represents more than just one kind, brings us depth with humor, and serves truth with eye rolls and freestyles. [Sorry Molly, your pussy does seem broken, figuratively. I mean, we saw you and Jared after he let you have some Cookie Crisps, so we know it’s not that broken. Or maybe that session did break it. ::smirks::]
Before we begin, for those of you who haven’t seen Insecure [how Sway?!] don’t worry, there won’t be any killer spoilers in here. Actually, there will be some, so you probably need to binge before reading.
Issa. Issa actually lives the life of many of the black women I know. Working in the non-profit world, for little or no pay. Organizations built by white people trying to do good for a community they know nothing about, never lived in unless it looks like a great spot to gentrify, and immediately call the police if their car stalls rather than asking for help. So their idea of helping low-income communities is to immerse them in a culture they already know about. Like do you think we haven’t seen drum circles, been to a museum, seen a sports game? And this constant narrative within the show may seem to be “doing to much” but it played down a majority of white work environments. Ask any black person; they’ll have a story for you. [Don’t do this. I can’t be held responsible for what happens afterwards. It was just used as a way to describe how common this is.]
One of my favorite parts is when she’s in front of the class talking about community service [S1E1]. When asked if they have any questions, they grill her on her personal life. Dayniece even drops a common statement heard from men about black women, “My dad said ain’t nobody checkin’ for bitter-ass black women anymore.” Being in front of adults is a piece of cake in comparison to being in front of kids. Children are monsters! They will roast you before even stepping over the threshold. They can make a grown person cry. Their sense of smell when it comes to fear is equivalent to animals. For anyone who has had done this, they know the anxiety brought on by little adults. It’s life altering.
Molly. The super successful, career driven, beautiful, need to have a ring by 35, Greek strutting, snobby [she is…don’t anyone lie and say she isn’t uppity], this guy must tick every box, sort of woman. [No shade to Greek life, at all, but step outside that world for JUST a second. Think about your experience, hazing et al., was it really all you say, or is the hype so much, you can’t really tell?] I truly love Molly’s character and all she goes through. It’s a definite cringe worthy, learning experience, but it also brings to light certain dichotomies of the real world we never address.
For instance, why the sexual orientation double standard. If a woman says she’s kissed another woman, identifies as bisexual, sexually fluid, queer, or has been with another woman, it’s considered “hot”. When a man says it, he’s gay. Immediately, Molly flaunted her experience like a badge of honor but wrote Jared off as gay man. Women aren’t considered lesbians if the tables are turned. If anything, society makes it a perverted sport to “turn” a woman one-way or another. Why?
When Molly bumped into a former hot-mess of a friend that turned her life around after seeking a therapist, Molly judged her. She not only judged, but also made the woman’s life seem less than and sad. No disrespect, but I’m not having a Molly using my personal tribulations as a way to say, “Wow, I’m not THAT bad yet.” If anything, seeing a therapist is clarity everyone needs. People meet you and see a side of you. We all have insecurities that we don’t showcase to the world, but a therapist should be an unbiased third wheel to guide you through that fog in life. To see things you have chosen to ignore. So much of the world scoffs at the idea of seeking mental help, when in reality it’s rewarding and millions of people could do with reaching out. But due to this condemnation, people decide to sweep it under a rug and many times become a toxin to themselves and those around them. It’s no wonder mental health is so low on the totem pole of things to manage.
Friendship. The friendship is so real and so deep. Issa’s group of close girlfriends consists of four different personalities. And though there are four, it’s actually two groupings of besties. Not that they don’t support and care for one another, but there is always that ride or die duo. [I hope, come season two, they showcase the jealously that can develop in situations like that, because it happens. Think of all your group of friends… it’s happened.] And speaking of jealousy, that best friend fight after Issa’s event was hard to watch because most have had that gut-wrenching argument. It was low-blows that needed to be said, but not while angry. Those are the sort of fights any regular ole’ companionship would never survive. Like that is soul mate status. Even how they wind up making up is too real.
But there’s that other beautiful side of it. When you’re trying to live your best life and someone tries to come in and fuck shit up by showing up UNANNOUNCED to YOUR event. Your bestie swoops in to intercept that touchdown. They know what you need telepathically…every time.
And sometimes your friends are just petty as fuck; airing your dirty laundry because. It could be unintentional, out of spite, whatever… but it happens. If your bestie, or mediocre compadres is doing this constantly… they are not your friends. I actually had someone who did this, and she loved to do it in front of people that we both had just met. Never would she do it one-on-one, just in front of randoms we’d known for a hot second. When confronted, she didn’t see it like that and dismissed my complaints as delusions. Suffice it to say, we’re not friends anymore.
Ugh, this show is just so good! I wanted to make this post extra special by having all the Cs be Bs as homage to Thug Yoda. [If you don’t know what this means, you need batch up fast. See I did it there with “catch”!] But because that just makes things more difficult, we’re giving away two (2) copies of the complete season of Insecure! Ayyyyyyyeeeee! ::make it bounce, make it bounce like Spalding::
How can you win? At 11AM EDT, I’ll be posting the image on our Instagram page. All you have to do is follow our page, like, and underneath the photo tell us your favorite moment from season one. It could be Daniel’s suit when he crashed the charity event, Molly trying to give the intern tips, Kelly spilling drinks on herself, maybe Jidenna coming in because Molly needed that win. Anything. Just make sure to follow, like and comment below the image. Follow, like, comment. Easy as pie.
Two winners will be chosen April 1, 2017 (no fooling! Get it? Whatever!) and announced 2PM EDT. This is GLOBAL contest, so anyone, anywhere, can enter.