Let me just begin by saying, not all food subscription boxes were built the same. [Says the woman who’s only tried two so far, but already believes she can beat Nigella Lawson in Master Chef.] So, not everyone will enjoy what I enjoy. Some call my palette bourgie and expensive. I call it refined and informed. And with that I say, Blue Apron did not win.

Don’t boo me! This is simply my opinion.

Blue Apron didn’t meet expectations for many reasons, but one stood out more than the others – the instructions.

When you’re one who doesn’t cook regularly, or even just easing your way into it as a beginner, Blue Apron would be my first choice. Pricing is amazing. Menu options are simple, yet advanced enough you wouldn’t think take-out is a better option. And everything comes labeled and ready to chop, making for a not so bad experience. But the instructions!? My goodness…what was that?

For instance for the Milanese chicken it said to cook it on each side for a certain amount of time or until golden brown. It could have been the cut of meat and its thickness, but even after 10 minutes on each side (12 on the other portion) it wasn’t cooked. It was like biting into a juicy, rubber chicken. The succulence was trapped inside, but the cut just wasn’t cooking. The outside definitely got to a golden brown, with one side being a more gradient black-brown. Strike 1.

Every place it tells you salt, DON’T! It would turn out to be a salt brine in your mouth, sucking up any moisture your glands naturally create. Strike 2.

Seared cod with udon noodles, which I thought was going to be the bees-knees, was not. The mushrooms never really became soft. It too was very rubbery when trying to eat. The noodles were too heavy and thick… something lighter, like vermicelli, would have been an ideal trade off. Especially because once the noodles were added, they overtook the vegetables. It didn’t mix as well as it should have. The cod, even after wasting several paper towels to soak up the water, it broke apart in the pan. Strike 3.

And the pimento cheeseburger… Well. It almost wasn’t prepared as I HATE pimento cheese, but when I looked for the red pepper come prep-time, I couldn’t have been happier it was not in the box. So it wound up being a plain cheeseburger with a DELICIOUS collard green and carrot slaw. Now the slaw, I would make again. So no strikes on this one.

It was just a really disappointing experience, and I feel that after having tried who-shall-not-be-named, I’ve become spoiled and expect more. The flavors I’d hoped for weren’t here. The dietary options weren’t available. The instruction to execution was lacking. The menu wasn’t “great”, so I can’t say, for me, it would be worth the money. At first I thought it was just me who felt this way, but a couple of friends who have tried the two-person meal agree. I even cancelled my subscription with no intention to return. [Which was weirdly empowering… but that’s another story.]

Like I said, please don’t not give them a shot because of what my view. Everyone on the fence should give it a go and see where it takes them.

This link gives you $30 off for first timers. Please feel free to let me know your thoughts, or advise on what you think I could have done differently to alter my overall experience.